chrissigrl: (Default)
[personal profile] chrissigrl
Stop talking incessantly about your wedding, Engaged Friends. Yes, we all realize it's a very important event in your life. But The Wedding has suddenly become your life. Every phone call, every text message, every status update is about The Wedding. Place settings, favor choices, wedding "colors", who on your guest list is allowed to bring a date ("Only other engaged friends and people in REALLY SERIOUS relationships!"), and who isn't ("Everyone else!"). I mean, Christ, I even got a Christmas card this year that was a lot of garble about The Wedding, and then had a teeny tiny "Merry Christmas!" tacked at the bottom.

Engaged Friends, it does not have to be this way. Why, I have several friends who are engaged and are still perfectly capable of, you know, having a life separate of The Wedding. We can go to a bar and talk for hours and have The Wedding not even come up. Some of these people are even on this blogroll. Let them be an example to you, Engaged Friends, of how it is COMPLETELY POSSIBLE to talk about things like white dresses and reception locations while ALSO talking about things like grad school, awesome new recipes you've tried, and the crazy life one can live in this great city of ours.

Maybe I'm overly sensitive to all this stuff because I've reached my mid-to-late 20's and suddenly this is all everyone is doing, pairing up, and so this is what everyone wants to talk about, and I'm simply burnt out on it. Please understand, Engaged Friends; I care about you, we were friends before you decided to be a Legal Pairing, and we will be friends after. But if we're still talking about The Wedding by this time in 2011, I'm going to unfriend you, unfollow you, and make sure to leave your spouse's name off of our yearly Christmas card. I want you to be happy. I just want to talk about something else (ANYthing else) for a while.

Date: 2010-01-11 04:51 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
Wait two years and all they will be talking about is their pregnancy.

Wait five years and all they will be talking about is their mortgage and/or all the dudes they are going to fuck as soon as their divorce is final.

Wait 25 years and all they will talk about is their grandchildren.

Date: 2010-01-11 05:41 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
i wonder if Marrieds get sick of hearing:

DUDE, how late were we out last night?!!


DUDE, last night was crazy!!!

they're like 'yeah, yeah, yeah. you like to get drunk and have no responsibilities. WE GET IT.'

Date: 2010-01-11 05:47 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
Well, people keep reading my blog....

Date: 2010-01-12 06:32 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
Hey, how long until I turn into one of the hags from Sex and The City?

Date: 2010-01-12 11:13 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
Never. You are far too cute for that.

Date: 2010-01-11 07:28 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
Heeheeheeheehee..... you kids today!!

Date: 2010-01-11 07:34 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
I'm not saying it's not something to talk about- it is, after all, a huge life event. Let's talk about it.

But I have a couple friends where it's just getting out of control. Weddings where I'm going to have to travel FAR, and NOT bring a date because I don't have a boyfriend "before the deadline", so I'll be seated alone, a million miles away, at a table where I know NO ONE, gnawing on fishy salmon and overcooked vegetables.

AND I have to bring a present. A fancy one.

Obviously, I am not looking forward to it. And it's getting hard to pretend that I am, if every time we chat, it's about the damn wedding that I don't even want to go to.... How many times can you say "I'm sure it's gonna be GREAT!!" ?

Date: 2010-01-13 01:30 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
Think how tired of the wedding conversations the grooms must be.

What I meant by my earlier comment is all the friends I had who could not stop talking about their wedding became the ones who could not ever start talking about their children after they got pregnant.

It's like they get so focused on these major life events that they forget to actually have a life.

Date: 2010-01-12 07:23 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
You know what's crazy? I'm getting pressure to talk MORE about my wedding. Here's the typical conversation:

"So how's WEDDING PLANNING going!?"
"Well, I bought my dress, but the rest is going to have to wait until I get grad school all sorted out."
"But you've set a date at least?"
"Well, no. I'm going to wait to see what school I get into. We'll have to plan the date around the academic calendar."
"Have you decided on a VENUE!?"
" Listen, I'm not pregnant- Carey and I are going to get into all this stuff when we've got our immediate future planned out."
[awkward silence and faintly accusatory looks]

So thanks for this post. I was starting to feel like BadBride or something.


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