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You stay Classy, New York!
Jul. 25th, 2005 12:01 pmThere's been an overwhelming abundence of high class crudeness and acts of crassery occuring around me lately. For you, I submit:
Item 1:
A photo, titled "No Slumberparty", on the front page of Manhattan's favorite free rag, Metro:
The caption reads, "a woman makes her way among hundreds of sleeping tourists at a shelter in downtown cancun, Mexico...", regarding precautionary meausures being taken for Hurricane Emily. At first look, it's a vaugely overwhelming snapshot of the trouble some nice people enduring hardship on what was supposed to be a fun vacation.
Look again!
The women mentioned in the photo caption is there, all right, indeed making her way.
But upon closer inspection we also see this man, making HIS way into his Burbury boxers.
Great photo editing, Metro!
Item 2: Last Thursday night, a humdrum ride on the 5 train turned into amateur night at Scores, when a gaggle of loud teenage african american girls started using the pole in front of me as a stripper's pole. And I'm not talking some basic campy "ooh, look at me, I'm crotch dancing the pole! Woooo!" either. I'm talking full out, swinging-around-in-an-open-split, hanging-upside-down-by-the-legs, the-drunk-dude-in-the-corner-with-the-40-started-throwing-singles exotic dancing. Had I a camera at the time, there would be pictures, because I know the odds of anyone believing me without seeing it is small- but this event 100% absolutely occured - i almost got a faux J.Lo boot to the face when one of them swung around a little too close. I didn't know whether to be disgusted or impressed. I picked mostly disgusted.
Item 3: The NYPD of Port Authority. New Yorks Bravest certainly showed themselves off well, when upon seeing a crying blond girl who had just had her wallet lifted [me], didn't ask, "Are you alright?" or, "Do you have a way home?", but merely said, "Yeah girly, that sucks," and walked away. Thanks a lot, Coppers! Eff you!
Thanks for being so classy lately, New York City!
Not.
Item 1:
A photo, titled "No Slumberparty", on the front page of Manhattan's favorite free rag, Metro:
The caption reads, "a woman makes her way among hundreds of sleeping tourists at a shelter in downtown cancun, Mexico...", regarding precautionary meausures being taken for Hurricane Emily. At first look, it's a vaugely overwhelming snapshot of the trouble some nice people enduring hardship on what was supposed to be a fun vacation.
The women mentioned in the photo caption is there, all right, indeed making her way.
But upon closer inspection we also see this man, making HIS way into his Burbury boxers.
Great photo editing, Metro!
Item 2: Last Thursday night, a humdrum ride on the 5 train turned into amateur night at Scores, when a gaggle of loud teenage african american girls started using the pole in front of me as a stripper's pole. And I'm not talking some basic campy "ooh, look at me, I'm crotch dancing the pole! Woooo!" either. I'm talking full out, swinging-around-in-an-open-split, hanging-upside-down-by-the-legs, the-drunk-dude-in-the-corner-with-the-40-started-throwing-singles exotic dancing. Had I a camera at the time, there would be pictures, because I know the odds of anyone believing me without seeing it is small- but this event 100% absolutely occured - i almost got a faux J.Lo boot to the face when one of them swung around a little too close. I didn't know whether to be disgusted or impressed. I picked mostly disgusted.
Item 3: The NYPD of Port Authority. New Yorks Bravest certainly showed themselves off well, when upon seeing a crying blond girl who had just had her wallet lifted [me], didn't ask, "Are you alright?" or, "Do you have a way home?", but merely said, "Yeah girly, that sucks," and walked away. Thanks a lot, Coppers! Eff you!
Not.
